Who knew that someone would actually name all of the little bumps inside the base of your skull? Honestly, I think I can feel one of them pulsating right now.

Ok, since my desperate housewife is unreachable, I suppose I'll tell my blind date story to you, and then you can go tell her. While your at it tell her to blog something. Anything.

Ok, so my date was a set up by my coach friend Michelle and her husband. We met up at their BBQ...I was in my casual jeans and a tshirt.....He arrived in a pressed button down white oxford, pin strip suit pants, and shiny black shoes. Wow. On a Saturday BBQ. I see the investment banker.

That's ok. I can totally look past that. I'll just think...young sucessfull stock broker..

The part I couldn't look past is when he handed me a framed back and white picture from Michelle's mantle. I look down at a very sweet professionally done photo of she and her husband holding the firecracker 2 year old who was obviously medicated for this picture.

In that second the firecracker ran high pitch screaming between us. I look up thinking .... I never knew my ears could hear that pitch.... looking around to see if Teva is in convulsions somewhere in the corner.... He reaches out taking the picture back and says:

'I am so jealous. This picture is exactly what I want.'

I'm sure I stood there for a good 30 seconds with my jaw (mandible) wide open before i finally could make a sound. I squeeked out

'I need to find my wine'

THAT kiddos is the moment I started planning my escape.

Please don't get me wrong. I adore kids. I'm sure one day I'll have a few that live in my house. But seriously. Tell me on a first date that you want a wife and kid and a black and white photograph on the mantle, and you can set the stopwatch on my rubber burning exit.