Seriously. How is it that you are still single? (a question I heard twice yesterday, once in the shower, and then again in the beer garden at the farmers market)As I'm holding a drink, hair pulled back in a head band because the muppet look was a little out of control after the heat of the day. A tank top with something spilled down the front of it, hiking shorts, and sock monkey flip flops. ( I laugh at myself, I am dangerously good looking)
'Seriously Amanda'
'How did a conversation go from my psychiatrist to my twisted love life?'
"Well why is it that you will only date men who you know aren't available to be there for you?'
(looking around) "I think that we should roll a couch out here and I should start paying YOU $95 an hour to analyze my craziness"
"The extra money would be nice......"
(a beer glass and a wine glass tap in cheers)
'You could have a different clientele out here each night. Look, there is a drunk girl over there crying, she could be next on the couch.'
'See, she's TOO emotional, as opposed to YOUR fear of being emotionally available. Aren't your feelings hurt?'
'Yea. Thursday nights could be a group session. I could be in the group with her. I bet I have a lot to learn about letting my emotions out from the hiccuping girl who randomly sobs to her gin and tonic'.
6 comments:
OK, I admit it. I am soooooooo lost here. Who asked you that while you were in the shower and who was quizing you at the bar? Tell whoever it was to "take a lap". Maybe they could do a little something with the girls on the run who were forever trying to fix you up. And for the record, I LOVE your sock monkey flip-flops!
Hi Mrs. King,
It's Liz. I have to admit...it was me...both times. I will gladly take the lap, but my preference is to take it on my bright pink and purple cruiser!
PS. Can I call you Mom? Look foreward to meeting the family!
OK Liz, lap request is cancelled. Of course you can call me Mom, or Ma King like Tiffany's crazy friends do. If I don't see you in GJ soon put Amanda in that snappy cruiser and come to SC for a visit any old time. I'm jonesin' for girls anyway.....
PS... if it wasn't you in the shower you're a good friend to take the heat.
a) my friends are not crazy
b) my sister is
c) I got her the sock monkey flip flops, and they're soooooo not the reason she's single
d) I was on the phone with Amanda while she and Liz were in the shower. True story. And I'm stickin' to it.
oh amanda, you better hurry.....your trade in value is going down daily
dan the forever neighbor kid
Hang on there young Daniel.... the girl is approaching "classic" status and you KNOW how valuable those things can be....
Giggles and hugs to you!
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